Sunday, March 22, 2015

A Considerable Speck - robert frost

So this boy, right....

He's got me all kinds of conflicted. I like him. I really do. I like him enough to be all "Nah, I'm not sexually traumatized or anything, I totally want the D" and stuff. Which, in all fairness, on Friday morning I totally did. So that's a thing now...

I like him.

And I'm fairly certain he likes me. People are saying so, anyways, himself included. But I'm not sure what this thing he and I have is and that bothers me a bit. We're not dating, technically. We're certainly not a couple. Once a week (sometimes less) we hang out - which has progressed into making out lately. So what is it - one of those friends with benefits situations? I just don't know see....

And for a while there, that didn't matter. I don't need to always define my relationships with people, but for some reason, I want a bit more clarity on this one.

I'm going to lay out what I do know:

~He likes me.
~He enjoys spending time with me.
~He's really keen on following me out to Seattle eventually.
~His dad seems to really like me, too. That's not a bit odd. 
~He's always reluctant to part when our meetings come to an end.
~I think we have decent chemistry...

 Frankly, I'm not well-versed in healthy and normal romantic relationships, so I'm not sure if I'm just reading more into it than I should or if I'm missing the ball completely. And I know it would simply make the most sense to just ask him, but I'm not sure I'm entirely ready for any honest answers.

I'm not worried about him running away, I'm genuinely concerned that I might bail on him. And Christ, I don't want to do that - I like him.

So this is just me venting and getting a few things off my chest. If you have some advice for me, though, I'd be happy to hear it.


  1. Aww, those are good feelings :)

    Would you feel comfortable explaining that you don't need to always define relationships with people but you would like a bit more clarity? It's honest and if you phrase it like that it won't sound so much like "so what's going on?" which never goes over well.

    1. Probably a good idea, I like the idea of that phrasing. I just wonder about the timing, now that we've done the do, so to speak...

  2. I think her suggestion is good, it seems clear he likes you but it would be cool to know if you two are exclisive etc.

    1. Well from the conversations this dude and I have, neither of us are even considering anyone it feels exclusive...but an exclusive what, you know?