Monday, December 16, 2013

Life Chat # 2

Fairly self-explanatory.
I've been talking to some many people who feel that they don't fit in or aren't good enough.
So I felt compelled to talk about this.

Wednesday, December 11, 2013

Holiday Blog Things - what do these say about you?

You Are Apple Pie
You love the holidays because they are the coziest time of year for you. You love to kick back and relax.
You have holiday laziness down to a science. You order all your gifts online and pop some easy food into the oven.

You don't get why people stress this time of year. You like to instead count your blessings and appreciate what's good in your life.
You find the sounds and smells of this season to be a great comfort to you. And you are going to enjoy every moment!
You Are Cider
Your holiday personality is cozy.
The holidays are your favorite time to stay home, stay warm, and spend time with those you love.

You don't need a lot to make you happy over the holidays.
Seeing an old relative or favorite holiday film is enough to make your day.
Your Ideal Holiday Scene is Nostalgic
The holidays make you feel like you're a kid again, and you love the magic that they bring into your life.
You are the type who still wishes that Santa was real, and you're not above leaving him cookies on Christmas Eve.

The holidays are mostly sweet for you, but you also take the time to reflect on the past and what (and who) you miss most.
You see this as a special time of year where almost anything can happen. You allow yourself to dream and believe in the magic.
You Are Considerate and Mature
You approach the holidays with responsibility and cooperation.
You'll do your part to make sure that everyone else has a happy holiday.

You aren't particularly picky or high maintenance during the holidays.
You're happy to be in the company of people you love, and you're willing to "go with the flow."

Of all the types, you are the most likely to give someone exactly what they want.
You're also the most likely to wrap all your presents well - to prevent peeking!
Your Year Was a "C" Year
When it comes right down to it, your year was pretty average. It was okay.
It wasn't the best of years, but it wasn't the worst of years either. You are sort of relieved it's over though.

Here's hoping that next year is significantly better, or at least better than ever.
Remember that the new year can be a fresh start. Try to embrace the idea of starting over a little.

Tuesday, December 10, 2013

( つ﹏╰)

Hey guys! So it's been a long time since I've done a super personal update kind of post and I figure with the upcoming holidays and possible lack of computer/internet connection looming I would go ahead and just fill you in now. 

Fall semester 2013 is finally wrapping up and I couldn't be happier. This was my worst semester yet (and topping last spring was no easy feat if any of you remember that...) and I'm so ready for it to be over and to move on and conquer new stuff. It's crazy to think that it's actually been weeks since I've regularly attended any of my classes. Yeah, it's pretty bad. But I'm working with some of my professors on taking incompletes for their courses and making it up next term. It'll be a lot of work but I'm hoping to get my shit under control during the winter holidays.

I'll have some time to relax and unwind, visit my doctor and deal with medication issues, and maybe do a bit of writing to help get the bad stuff out and into a place where I can face it down and kill it. Some days it feels like I'll never really conquer my depression/anxiety but I'm going to keep fighting and trying to make myself a better and more well adjusted individual. If I want to get anywhere in life that doesn't involve a padded room and color crayons, I have to do this. Not that a padded room sounds...terrible. But a waning imagination won't sustain me for long.

So this is what I do. I stay up late to watch talk shows, drink all the caffeinated beverages in the house, and then stay up later whilst watching Youtube videos and pretending the outside world doesn't exist. Sleep comes sporadically if at all and I am constantly in companionship with red and irritated eyeballs. Overall it's not a good situation and I really need to fix it. I'm working on it. I just need this year to end and 2014 to sweep away all the horrible shit I got myself into.

With that in mind, I guess I'm making some resolutions for the New Year:

1. Sort out my medication issues.
2. Keep up a daily yoga and meditation practice.
3. Get more exercise and eat better.
4. Sleep!
5. Stay on top of my studies.

Monday, December 2, 2013

A pixie cut? What?!

When I woke up today I had long, luscious, and not-so-healthy hair. It's been dyed and fried quite a few times over the past year and honestly, I was just tired of letting it sit on my head. I had no will or energy to really style it and trying to mess around with french braid up-dos and the like was just frustrating. 

So at around 3 pm I skedaddled over to the Model College of Hair Design (just a mere two blocks from my apt.) and asked for a hair cut. My stylist was a junior student named Amber who was REALLY nervous about hacking off so much length. So she had a couple of senior stylists watch over and help out from time to time. Overall, the entire process took about forty-five minutes to an hour. But there was shampooing and styling involved so ....can't complain.

Pardon the face, I was being silly and this one showed off the layers in the best possible angle. I got myself a pixie cut. It's really really short in the back (clipper length 6 short!) and there are some layered bangs in the front. Overall, I really dig it. 

I had an audience of about seven people during this haircut and they were all super thrilled about how cute a style it was, how well it suited my bone structure, and that I kind of looked like a model. A super ego boost, that's for sure.

My head feels a lot lighter (duh!) and I'm still getting used to it, but I'm happy with this decision and if I ever need a touch-up I know where I'll be going for it! 

Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Tag: Autumn is Awesome!

If you watch this video, consider yourself tagged. You can either do this on your blog or make a video response. Good luck! 

Monday, November 11, 2013

Do not go Gentle into that Good Night

You know that feeling you get when you have a TON of homework piling up and a lot of studying to do and you JUST don't feel like doing it? Yeah - I'm having that issue right now. So I'm on Youtube watching gaming videos and rearranging my living room. Yes. It's nearly 9 pm and I'm moving my furniture around. Good gods.

But maybe a visual change will be a good thing. I'm trying to make some major changes in my life - get my shit together and back on the wagon. I have plans. I set goals. I need to remember them and why I'm here. I can't keep slacking off and just letting it all slip away. I can't just sleep away my life or hide in this apartment forever. Nothing will change and it's not very productive.

So I'm making changes. I want to be a better person. A better friend. A better student, etc. And it's gonna be a hard road out, but I plan to face my depression and anxiety issues head-on. I CAN conquer this. I CAN handle this. I CAN rise above. I just have to believe that.

I stopped seeing my counselor. The whole process really wasn't helping me much. I know what I need to do - constantly reiterating in front of some trained professional isn't going to help. I just have to get out there and DO what I know I need to do.

So bare with me - I'm coming out of the tail end of an identity crisis.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Halloween - warning: picture heavy!

Last weekend, my mom hosted a small Halloween party for some family and friends. I used it as a grand opportunity to doll up to my Gothy best, but before all that:

On Halloween proper - I dressed up in one of my favorite Bodyline pieces and went to class. I got a lot of compliments on my "Halloween outfit" - no one called it a costume. ^_^ After that, the boy and I went up to JoAnn fabrics to pick up supplies for his costume. It took us a while - I can't believe how busy that place was on a weekday.

We spent most of Friday putting together costumes, messing with last minute decorations, and planning games. I made a rather interesting drinking board game.

Saturday morning came and went. We got ourselves dressed up and bustled around the kitchen getting the food ready. It was hectic and stressful, but in the end it all paid off!

Hat - Target
Blouse - thrifted
Skirt - Bodyline
Tights - DEB
Boots - thrifted

Hat - Modified Bodyline
Coat - Punk Rave

Mask - Walmart
Shirt - thrifted

Overall I had a pretty good time and got pretty hammered. I don't drink that much so it was kind of nice to do it in the company of people I enjoyed being around. Cleanup was kind of a pain, but we managed to get the food put away before crashing.

And the best part  -  no hangover!

cross-posted to Les Fleurs Noires

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Spookin' Out the Joint!

Most college students don't have a whole lot to work with in terms of holiday decorating given the limited space and number of restrictions on what can/cannot be hung or lit. Luckily, I have a studio all to myself so I did some meager decorating for Halloween - granted this stuff is probably gonna stay up for the rest of the year BUT I did put it up in honor of the Feast of the Dead. ^_^

It all looked a good deal spookier and more fun after adding some cute Halloween overlays courtesy of Pixlr (my favorite site for quick edits - check 'em out if you haven't.) and I do feel I could have added some more stuff. Next year! 

Do you do any decorating for the holiday times, particularly Halloween? Let me know (or see!) what you have up around your place!

Sunday, October 20, 2013

3 Days of Style: outfit snaps

Outfit #1

Dress - Thrifted
Blouse- thrifted
Leggings - DEB
Boots - Walmart (circa 2006)
Necklace - Target

Outfit #2

Blouse - thrifted
Shorts - Wetseal
Skirt - DEB
Tights - Savers
Flats - Walmart
Scarf - Target

Outfit #3

Cardigan - Target
Tank - Walmart
Leggings- DEB
Boots - Walmart
Jewelry - vintage

I finally lugged my tripod up here so I can take decent photos. Woot! The next round will be much nicer looking!