Tuesday, January 31, 2012

The Worst Goth Makeup Tutorials. Ever.

Do you know how it is when you're cruising around Youtube looking for an interesting Goth makeup tutorial because you're either bored with your current look or want to try something new? Well....maybe that's just me, but I seem to have the best luck when it comes to finding the silliest and worst of Goth makeup tutorials.

And so, I'm going to compile them here for you. 

About.com's Silly Attempt
~This silly attempt from About.com is kind of cute, but I seriously wonder why non-Goths think they can do legit and good tutorials for this sort of thing.

Just Bitten Gothic
~Don't get me wrong, she's a beautiful girl. But vampire makeup =/= Goth makeup.

Goth Lips Tutorial
~The difference between Emo and Goth makeup is that Emo has very natural lips and Goth is black, black, black, even on the lips. ......herp durp. Okay?

Sexy Goth Makeup for Halloween
~Because Goth is a costume...you know?

Goth Makeup is Cool
~She loves all Goth people, it's cool.

Cyber Goth Makeup
~Green lipstick never looks good.

Expert Village's numerous atrocities
~Make sure to go through each video, if you can do so without really cringing.

This set is crap too. ^_^
~And the girl doing the makeup is cute too. What a shame.

Do you hate me yet? :)

Monday, January 30, 2012

And thus starts another week...

Sometimes I think my life is simultaneously incredibly boring and incredibly fucked up. Weekends, which used to be a godsend for me, have now become the bane of my existence. With so much tension between all parties involved, I don't really feel comfortable at home anymore. I'm starting to think it'd almost be better if I just stayed at school for the weekends.

What a dreadful thought - the very idea used to render me to tears. 

It's funny to me, really. I have this amazingly Goth'ed out bedroom and I'm lucky if I sleep in it once a month. Heck, I'm lucky if I hang out in it once a month. I kind of miss my room in all it's purple and black glory, with my nifty closet and my pretty dress form. It's decidedly lovelier than the crap hole I'm staying in now. 

On the up side, next year I'm going to live in Coborn Plaza Apartments. They still technically count as campus living even though they are apartment style and a little ways from the main campus. But! They are closer to downtown, a stone's throw away from the transit center, and I get a private bedroom/bath. That pretty much seals the deal. Nevermind that I'll be living with a couple of complete strangers....

As soon as possible, I'll make my prepayment and seal it in blood....or whatever. 

Moving on....

I decided to ease back into dressing up again. So today I threw on a grey and black monochromatic outfit that I'm quite happy with as its very comfortable and also quite simple.

I wanted to wear my little grey jumper dress again, so this is what I pulled together. The faux lace shirt I have on came from Walmart - I know, I know! What a steal right? I bought a few more things when I went to Target on Sunday, but I haven't taken photos yet. I surely will though! 

I'm still working up the nerve to tease my hair out like Siouxsie Sioux and paint my lips purple, but I'm sure I'll get there eventually. At the very least, I'm gonna rock some dark eye makeup tomorrow. This might be an after class affair, since hurriedly putting on eye shadow at 8 am is not the first thing on my list of priorities when I wake up. 

You know....I feel kind of optimistic about this week. I really do. Tonight's just a "catch up" night for homework and tomorrow I have that depression support group thing. Wednesday is tentatively held for Pagan Alliance and then on Thursday I get to chill with the awesome Creative Writing Club again. It's nice to get involved, even if I have to literally drag myself by my own hair, kicking and screaming. Not to mention two days out of this week merit visits to Bio Life to sell my fluids. Overall I'd say it's a decent schedule. 

Let's just hope I can stick to it. 

Saturday, January 28, 2012

A Day in the Life!

I haven't done a post like this in so long and come to think, I've probably never done for this specific blog. But since photo-based posts seem to do well here on Blogger and people find them interesting, I decided to go ahead.

And here...we... go...

Good morning. 8:00 am!

This is my breakfast. I can't start a day without some form of coffee. But don't worry, I also had oatmeal.

Whilst sipping that coffee, I get online and check my stuff, including Facebook.

It's a dreary grey morning in St. Cloud and this is the view out of my 8th story window.

Shower time! 9:30 am

And now I'm clean. 

Time to get dressed for the day.

And put on some simple makeup. Didn't feel up for more than that.

Casual stripes. Yay!

10:30 am. It's starting to snow pretty heavily...

So while I wait for it to clear up (I have class later) I work on my English essay.

My hair begins to dry so I take it down and let it air out. Much nicer now!

Noon. Instant chow mein noodles before rushing off to class.

Getting ready to go to class. Luckily, the snow stopped before I left the building and the sky cleared up a bit.

After class, I took the bus to the mall and wandered around a bit. It's kind of my Friday ritual, I suppose. I did buy a few things but I forgot to take photos.

Back to my dorm by 5:00 pm. Time to clean up the place.

Here's dinner: some fruit drink and a chicken-artichoke pastry thing.

Getting my stuff ready to go for the weekend. Can't forget these crucial items, you know? I almost always forget my toothbrush!

Ooh! The boy's here, time to head downstairs!

This is the night view outside my building. It was very cold and I had to walk fast.

Back in Buffalo, with Chris, in his bedroom. The drive there is only about 35 minutes.

I pull out my scissors and decide to give my hair a trim.

Oh look, more layers now!

10:30 pm. I'm exhausted, long week. Time for bed. Goodnight!

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Book Review: Beautiful Creatures

Today I am reviewing a book I recently finished. A while back I was on the hunt for some easy-reading material that had a darker theme and didn't cost much. What I plucked off the shelves of my local Wal-mart was this little YA gem:

Beautiful Creatures by Kami Garcia and Margaret Stohl is the story of Ethan Wate, a typical high school boy living in the deep south of the USA, dealing with basketball team issues, slutty girlfriend issues, and all the lame Civil War hoopla that goes on every year. Because you know, the south think they really did secretly win the war and all that....Adding to that, he's been having some really strange dreams about this girl....

Enter Lena Ravenwood, the new girl in town and niece of the creepy shut-in who lives in the spooky Ravenwood Manor. She blows this little southern town away with her arrival, literally. See, Lena's secret is that she's a Caster, a fancier word for witch, mage, magician, etc. She's descended from a whole line of Casters.

It would seem that Ethan and Lena are made for each other. They go through a lot of high school trials together, they fight against the town the wants to run Lena out together, and face some of the darkest magic known to man together. It's a story of cursed love and eternal love....blah blah blah. 

Basically, this story follows the formula that most supernatural teen romances follow. Boy meets Girl. Girl has...issues. Boy helps Girl with issues. Girls wants to push Boy away for his own safety. Boy doesn't listen. Tragedy ensues.

To be honest, it was kind of hard to get through the beginning of this book. All the characters, except for Ethan and his cool Voodoo grandma, were very two-dimensional and predictable. It seems the two authors drew on every basic high school stereotype they could think of that related to American high schools. You know, the cheerleaders were super bubbly and ditzy, but would stab anyone they didn't like in the back. The jocks were typically dumb, rough-housing type of guys. 

I even thought Lena herself was a bit of a stereotype. She's described as being a mix between nouveau punk and mallgoth. She writes depressing and bad poetry in a notebook she always carries with her and no matter what always dons a pair of scuffed up Converse shoes. 

Luckily, as we get deeper into the book, the plot(s) unfurl and the whole situation becomes a LOT more interesting. It was an interesting take on magic and the idea of Casting, and the evil characters were actually a lot more interesting and fun than the heroes and good guys. 

Would I recommend this book to anyone over the age of 18? Probably not, since I think it's aimed for the youngin's and harder to relate to if you're older than that. Still, if you want to some light reading during your spare time, it's not bad. It got me through numerous sessions of plasma donation. ^_^

Rating: 3.5/5 

What's black and blue?

Last week on Tuesday, I had a bit of a "mishap" at Biolife Plasma Services. It was a regular day and in the beginning a regular donation session. Unfortunately, I made the mistake of offering up my right arm, which contains a vein that has tendencies to prove troublesome. Most often, they can't get the needle situated just right in order to pull out ample amounts of blood and what tends to happen is a little wiggling around of said needle. Normally this isn't a huge issue, but they've propped it up against the vein wall before and THAT is uncomfortable. Seems that's what happened last Tuesday as well, only she pushed it a little bit further in than was necessary.

I think she knew right away that she had made a very grave mistake. Because after I complained about discomfort, she took the needle out of my arm and bandaged me up before getting my other arm hooked up, which then went flawlessly. What raised my suspicions even more was that little pack of ice she wrapped around my right arm before getting me started up again.

"Just in case it bruises," she says. Well yeah, that very same night it started to bruise. And it hurt like a bitch every time I flexed my arm. What the hell? thought I.

I went in last Friday for my second donation of the week.

The bruise was significantly darker by then and the technician who looked at my arms called a nurse over to investigate and basically see if it would even be safe for me to donate. This is where I learned what actually happened. You see, this technician from Tuesday who was fiddling with my needle poked it through my vein, from the inside, and didn't tell me. But that's what has accounted for all the nasty discoloration and pain last week.

This wouldn't have upset me so much if they had just told me beforehand. I had to find out after the fact. Rawr.

This is what it looks like today, more than a week later:

It's still dark. It's still gross. But it doesn't hurt anymore and apparently I'm good to go for donations. Although, I don't think I'll take my chances using that arm again....

Wish me luck on my donation today!~

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

I took action...

Last night I mustered up all the strength and courage that I had and took the elevator down to Sherburne's creepy and ominous basement. There was study room 6, a room designated for the depression support group every Tuesday at 6 pm. There's even a sign.

No one was there, so I sat in one of the less-than-comfortable chairs and waited. I didn't have to wait long, soon two girls came into the room. They introduced themselves, though for the life of me I can't remember their names. Anyways...one of them was the facilitator of the group and she welcomed me in. Soon more people showed up, a CA in a different building, one of my male classmates from English, an ethnic girl named Asha, and a very shy young man who's name I didn't catch - apparently he also suffers from social anxiety. In total there were maybe 7 or 8 of us. Not a terribly large group, but still enough to feel a bit self-conscious and anxious. 

Brief introductions were made and we talked shortly about why we were depressed, coping methods, what we think we need in our lives and then the conversations derailed quite quickly into lots of other things, including video games, literature, tea parties, and much more. We're all very different, clearly, but we are bonded by the fact that we suffer in ways most people can't understand. It was crazy to hear Liz talk about days when she just doesn't feel like eating, getting out of bed, or facing people. I was astonished to hear talk about wanting attention from people and then also wanting to push them away and be alone. How condescending it is to hear people ask you "How are you?" every time they see you. Or the well-meaning "Cheer up" or "Be more positive" comments that don't help. 

I didn't say much while I was there, but that's not surprising. It usually takes me a while to open up with a new group and even though I felt fairly comfortable with this lot, there was so much witty banter flying about that it was hard to get a word in edgewise. 

All in all though, I think I'm looking forward to next Tuesday's session.

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Past the Monday Woes..

Well dears, today is Tuesday. It's a rather bright and sunny day and the crisp winter temps have risen to something a bit more comfortable than below freezing, so I'm pleased with that. 

Also, I decided last night that I would try to dress up a bit more and hopefully use that to help lift my recently dismal mood. So I picked out some of my favorite wardrobe pieces and tossed them together with one or two items I don't wear much anymore.

The result:

Something casual with stripes. I haven't worn this particular tiered Hot Topic skirt in ages, but I'm sure glad I held onto it! I really like it paired up with a longer top! Since it's quite cold outside still, I added leggings and a cardigan. I'm not wearing my biker boots here, but that really pulled the outfit together. Add a hair bow and call it done! 

I didn't wear much makeup either, just a few slicks of mascara and some dusty eye-shadow. In my defense, I was pretty exhausted when I woke up and I couldn't convince myself to doll up more than that. 

Moving on...

Sophistique Noir's monthly theme for February is RINGS! I'm super exited about this one because I have some fantastic rings and this will give me an opportunity to wear and photograph them now. Anyone else joining in on this?

Monday, January 23, 2012

When it all comes toppling down...

It's a sad, sad thing when just sitting down to work on writing a blog entry makes you feel completely drained and dead. I remember the days when I was incredibly excited about getting this thing up and running. I wanted to post a TON of stuff, personal and otherwise. And I did quite a bit of both in the beginning.

Nowadays though, I can barely bring myself to whip up a quick "I'm still alive, will write more later" update. Even as I sit here, I'm trying to think of what to add in here to wrap this up so I can go curl up in bed with a cup of tea and stare out the window.

(brief intermission where I did actually make myself some tea)

I haven't been dressing up much lately, so I don't have any outfit snaps for you. I haven't been doing anything crafty or artsy, since I've been way too busy with school during the week and then sleeping on the weekends. I don't even really listen to music anymore, otherwise I might do some music spotlights or something.

Come to think of it, I don't do much of anything these days. School is stressful and hard for me to deal with, the new-found snowy landscape is having a dismal effect on my body, and I keep running from the notion that I might truly be depressed. All in all, the only thing I really want to do these days is sleep and I can't even do that since I'm suffering from some pretty extreme insomnia.

Isn't life grand?

I'm going to take some pro-active measures against all this though. My dorm hall holds group sessions in the basement every Tuesday evening to help people who might be depressed cope or find help. I think tomorrow night I might pop down there and see what they can do for me. Even if I can find some like-minded individuals who are also a bit lonely on campus, that's a good start. I need friends, I'm starting to realize. And not just the occasionally there when you need them online friends, but real ones.

If that doesn't work, I'm gonna swallow my pride and actually go to visit the psych center here on campus.  Wish me luck.

Thursday, January 19, 2012

*insert angry wailing*

Wanna know how I feel tonight?

That's how I feel tonight.

You see, I was recently notified that my beloved file-sharing website, MegaUpload, was viciously attacked and shut down by the United States Federal Government.  And by recently, I mean tonight. All this happened tonight. 

What does this mean, do you ask?

Well for one, it means I'm gonna have a heck of a time trying to find links to many of my favorite Asian dramas. It means, for a lot of other people, that any files they had uploaded - legally or otherwise, are now gone. My brother used MegaUpload to host a lot of photos and other files for his website. Now that it's all been removed, a good chunk of his web links don't work anymore. Thanks a lot, Feds.

In retaliation and protest, the hacker group Anonymous attacked the White Houses' website and many other industry's sites, including websites for major film and music companies. I feel that this is only the beginning to what is probably going to be a major internet backlash. They've kept it off local news so far, but once word spreads about this, it's gonna be an uproar. 

If the Feds feel safe going after a major file-sharing site like MegaUpload and taking it down whilst charging the owners for conspiracy against copyright, money laundering, and racketeering, who's next? Filesonic, perhaps? Rapidshare? Maybe they'll even go after Youtube....although Google's put up one hell of a fight. 

Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to 1984.

Let's have a moment of silence for our dearly departed MegaUpload, shall we? v_v

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

Sometimes I love the Internet

The other day, Google had a pretty cool image for their logo:

I'm a pretty big fan of the Addam's Family. I enjoy the movies and the old series is great too! So I literally squealed with delight when I saw that and immediately took a screen shot.

Also, on one of the fashion forums I frequently visit, one thread had exactly 666 replies. So I took a photo of that too.

Icing on the cake for all this? Friday is the 13th. ^_^

Monday, January 9, 2012

It Commences!

I was planning to start off this entry talking about my new classes that I attended today, but about a half hour after getting back to my (very lonely and empty) dorm room I sort of lost all the "genki" I had stored up to do so. Instead, I'm sitting in my room here trying not to cry. Because I just want to go home. Because I just want someone to talk to. I crave, no I need, some kind of meaningful human interaction. 

And I don't have it. Being here has made me realize all over again just how lonely this place is. People are so clique-ish, it's just like being in high school. If you were strange or different from the masses, you didn't get friends. I guess it's the same way here. The few people I do know on Facebook are always trying to cheer me up about my situation but I don't see any of them inviting me to hang out. Ever. 

Anyways, classes. I have two English classes on Monday and Wednesday, and then just one English course on Friday also. The first one is going to be a lot of fun. It's an Intro to Writing type of course and the professor is quite delightful. I like him. My second English course deals with mythology in literature and focuses solely on Greek and Roman myths, which I find a little upsetting and unfair. No Celtic lore? No Norse tales? How lame. 

I had to learn everyone's name in the first class. I absolutely hate when teachers make you play the name game. It's hard to connect names and faces to people you could care less about, you know?  We didn't really do that in my second class though. We just had to get in groups and discuss some of the things we expect mythology to cover - things like human struggles and emotions. All in all, it was an easy day, but I did not find even one person to talk to. 

Tomorrow I have Math and Philosophy of Religion. Let's hope those go better hmm?

Now I'm gonna go get my Youtube vlogger fix, do my homework, and try not to be miserable for the rest of the night.

Sunday, January 8, 2012

How-To: Cheap and Easy Wall Art

(Since today is Sunday, before classes, I'm going to spend the day running around to locate my new classrooms and other such student-ly things. Please enjoy this small tutorial/idea in my stead!)

I'm always struggling for ideas about what to put up on my walls. I hate bare walls. I'm not a huge fan of posters though and buying pretty frames and paintings is just a little out of my spending range. So I decided that I would make some wall art on my own to hang up. 

Here are a few easy ideas:

1. Put cards on your walls. I got quite a few holiday cards from people all over the world this year and I figured, what better way to display them than putting them up on the walls. You can do this with any kind of card though. If you prefer spooky Halloween themed cards, go crazy with it! Vintage postcards or Victorian themed holiday cards would work great for this also! 

2. Hang up your jewelry. A lot of people keep their necklaces and bracelets in boxes. I got a jewelry rack for Christmas and it gave me some ideas about how this could easily work with just a few pins and some creativity. First, you can just stick tacks or nails into the wall and hang your jewelry that way for display. But you could also make a pretty background for this using wrapping paper or even decorated cardboard!~

Both of these photos are from my bedroom back home. I wanted to make something cute for my dorm room as well. This tutorial is pretty simple:

What You Need:

~some pieces of cardboard
~paper and scissors to cut out shapes
~tape or adhesive
~spray paint

First, take your pieces of cardboard. These were from the inside of a bed sheet set, so they both were the same size. This is helpful, but not required, depending on the number of pieces you want to make.

Using any kind of paper, cut out some shapes that you want on your wall art. I choose simple shapes, like a heart and a cat shape. You can do anything you want, really.

After taping your shapes somewhat securely onto the cardboard, take them outside and spray paint them in a color of your choice in a well ventilated area. 

After they dry, carefully peel the paper off and voila~ You have some cute wall art to hang up. It almost looks best if some of the paint gets underneath the paper a little bit. You get a blurred effect and it's quite nice.

Hope you enjoy!~