Tuesday, January 31, 2012

The Worst Goth Makeup Tutorials. Ever.

Do you know how it is when you're cruising around Youtube looking for an interesting Goth makeup tutorial because you're either bored with your current look or want to try something new? Well....maybe that's just me, but I seem to have the best luck when it comes to finding the silliest and worst of Goth makeup tutorials.

And so, I'm going to compile them here for you. 

About.com's Silly Attempt
~This silly attempt from About.com is kind of cute, but I seriously wonder why non-Goths think they can do legit and good tutorials for this sort of thing.

Just Bitten Gothic
~Don't get me wrong, she's a beautiful girl. But vampire makeup =/= Goth makeup.

Goth Lips Tutorial
~The difference between Emo and Goth makeup is that Emo has very natural lips and Goth is black, black, black, even on the lips. ......herp durp. Okay?

Sexy Goth Makeup for Halloween
~Because Goth is a costume...you know?

Goth Makeup is Cool
~She loves all Goth people, it's cool.

Cyber Goth Makeup
~Green lipstick never looks good.

Expert Village's numerous atrocities
~Make sure to go through each video, if you can do so without really cringing.

This set is crap too. ^_^
~And the girl doing the makeup is cute too. What a shame.

Do you hate me yet? :)


  1. Oh my god!! The girl in the picture on top really don't have a clue! Or is it for a masquerade?

  2. I couldn't even make it through the first one, didn't even try the rest.

    I do, however, disagree with the "green lipstick never looks good" thing. It's just that only professional makeup artists can make it work...

  3. Well, fair enough. I think if the lipstick is of good quality and worn right, it can look awesome. But for an everyday user and with a stick purchased in the Halloween section....no. Never.

  4. That top picture... WTF? And expert(that's a laugh) village... I watched like three of their videos. Why is this even titled goth?! Then they mixed black an brown shadows. why? Just... WHY?
    Okay I'm done bitching, but wow. I never would have known these people existed , and a few of them scare me a little lol.

  5. I dunno, I find using the occasional single video from Expert Village is good to illustrate a particular technique ( used one to demonstrate using white foundation to lighten a natural shade... but I agree that taken as whole tutorials they are just a bit embarassing.

  6. I was watching these at work, so the sound had to be off, but just from watching the body movement of the first video, yikes.

  7. i think some of them are a joke?! or better: I HOPE. ugh.

  8. The cyber one.... well, the only thing RIGHT about it was choosing neon green and yellow. You can't draw higher than natural eyebrows with your real eyebrows showing - jeez, that should be obvious. And the lips... Maybe she should go watch some of the good tutorials on how to do brightly coloured lips. The one from the blue clown with weird hair was just scary. Something about glueing stuff to her face O.o Mostly eek. I'm amazed that people actually put tutorials this awful up on the internet. Why make a tutorial about something i you don't actually know how to do it yourself??? Since when has brown been a Goth colour? Unless you're doing Steampunk/Goth cross-over, and even then it's from Steampunk >.< The only one that was actually effective was ironically the Halloween costume one - it was a bit heavy, but I've seen people pull that off in Goth clubs. It's just a shame that we're seen as a costume. Oh well.

  9. LOL, they are truly worst when it comes to gothic makeup, they don't even look goth to me, something like punky messy makeup. he he.

    Cheers to all!
    Halloween Makeup Ideas