Friday, December 30, 2011


Hello Doomcookies and Jellyspoons!~

It is your delightfully batty host, once again updating this dismally undead blog to inform you all that I did not commit Christmas suicide or anything of the sort. In fact, I'm doing quite well. The holidays are very nearly over and I actually suspect that my New Years celebration will go quite smoothly.

Instead of the traditional jaunt over my uncle's house for cards and booze, the boyfriend and I are dragging my younger brother with us to the cities for a treat at the new Japanese restaurant that opened this summer in the Minneapolis. It's called Zen Box, run by second generation Japanese folks, and Izakaya style. If you're not sure what that means, Google it, and you'll learn something new and shiny!

I tried to get rid of the annoying red and green Christmas hair today, but it's pretty stubborn. I put a medium brown dye over everything (which had started to fade drastically) and now everything just looks brown-green and brown-red. Oh least this way it's no SO noticeable that I had odd hair. ^_^

And I must admit, I like having darker hair.

If you're a follower of my Lolita-related blog, pop on over there for a holiday gift haul. I thought about posting it here, but I don't want to upload a shit ton more photos tonight. I actually have to leap away from the computer to go check on my spaghetti sauce and prepare dinner. Toodles~

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Holiday Blues

I think I'm beginning to truly despise the holiday season. If I didn't know any better, I'd say I was Mr. Scrooge's great great great granddaughter or something.

For the solstice, I did nothing to celebrate. But that's not terribly surprising...I've been falling off the pagan bandwagon for a while now. Christmas Eve was a literal nightmare for me. I was fine until people started arriving and then an anxiety attack set in and pretty much ruined the whole night for me. Not to mention my uncle harangued me for having a few glasses of wine. I'm 24, mind you.

Christmas Day was alright. I had dinner with my boyfriend's family and I was a bit intrigued at the amount of gifts I received. I had honestly expected next to nothing, since my family doesn't really do the gift thing anymore. My immediate sector is poor and the rest of them are stingy goats. So...yeah.

Honestly though, I'm just glad the holidays are over. I never before really understood why the holidays could be stressful. But when you hate your family, times are tough, and you're stressed out - well, I get it now.  I'm almost looking forward to the day when I move to Japan and can hang up all these silly "American" traditions and customs. They've been getting me down lately.

And now that Christmas is over, I'm going to dye my hair back to a normal shade and become invisible again for a while. It's my method of recuperating I guess. I'm not going back to red just yet, and since I've already been a blonde (for a short while) I figure I would try being a brunette for some time. I did black once and that looked horrible on me, so we'll settle for a nice deep shade of chestnut.

Does anyone else suffer from depression or anxiety during the holidays?

(p.s. I'll do a holiday haul once I get all my new crap over to my place.)

Monday, December 19, 2011

When the Dust Settles...

It's Monday evening. I'm sitting in the living room with my laptop upon a TV tray. A Perfect Circle is playing on Youtube, providing a nice lull for me to settle in and grind this entry out. I'm exhausted. My eyes hurt. But there's no rest for the wicked.

Finals are over. And with it my first semester of college. I thought I would feel relieved to just have it over. But I'm always melancholy when a chapter of my life closes. My delightful roommate is gone now. My classes are over. My friends seem to be lost in that chapter and now I'm just drifting alone in the ether. I feel kind of ...empty. I don't like endings. That's why I never finish any of my stories.

On Saturday, Chris and I drove to a bistro-cafe called Pardon My French in Eagan. That's where the holiday themed Lolita meetup was going down. I was actually excited for this one, but it went more awry than the Halloween meetup did. There was no real sense of organization and I felt...neglected. Again. I'm afraid I don't have anything in common with these people.

Chris wasn't thrilled with the event either and since he wasn't feeling good to begin with, we ducked out early. Again. As it was, the person who received my name for the Secret Santa drawing had only just arrived as we were leaving. I, of course, knew nothing. Now I have no gift. I did give the items I bought to Tessa and she seemed happy with them, so thank goodness for little blessings.

This is what I wore for the Meetup. I'm quite happy with it. It was elegant and comfortable. My hair turned out fantastic....finally. Vampire Red from Manic Panic is the way to go for sure...

On Sunday we went out to dinner with Chris's family for a late birthday celebration. He turned 23 on Tuesday so yeah, we needed to do something. We ended up going to Red Lobster. I haven't been there for years and I was looking forward to some of the thing I remembered. Just as luck would have it, they completely changed their menu and I honestly couldn't think of anything there I actually wanted to eat...v_v

Oh well.

This is what I wore for the dinner event. I'm quite in love with my hair. I gathered it all up, twisted it up to one side and secured it there with some claw clips. Add a festive little headband and voila! This is also my newest dress from Bodyline, which I love, since it reminds me a bit of Beetlejuice! <3 it's Monday and I'm completely burnt out. I spent most of today in my footie pajamas watching movies. I finally got some laundry done and decided to think about my numerous sewing projects, but I'm sure I won't do much more until tomorrow.

Chris will be here tata!

Monday, December 12, 2011

Finals Week: Round 1

So finals week is off to a great start. I didn't do much studying over the weekend, even though I should have, but I did pretty good on two exams so far. I have another one at 7:30 am tomorrow morning and then one at 10:00 am on Friday. I'll study more tonight for my final exam tomorrow and then the rest of the week is pretty much devoted to brushing up on my entire Math course.

Also, it's official. Pillarbox Red from Manic Panic is crap. I redyed my hair this weekend. I went ahead and reinforced the green a bit and then used up the entire rest of the bottle of red and after washing it out it's still pretty orange. I don't know if that particular color just looks that way or what....but if I ever do something similar I'm going with a much darker red shade. And maybe a different brand. Perhaps Raw does red as well....*ponders*

Too bad it's so blurred (boyfriend sucks with camera) but here's an elusive smile from me. Aren't I purdy? And yes, my hair dye shirt is a pink striped thing. Sue me. 

So....since the next Lolita meetup is this Saturday, I'm going to use it as a jumping off point to wear Lolita (or some Gothic variation) for the duration of my winter break. That's three weeks of totally awesome fashion. And since I have quite a bit of new stuff to break in, I figured why the heck not?

Speaking of stuff to break in, I went ahead and bought my dream pair of shoes this weekend. Target's had these babies lying around for over a month now and I kept waiting for the price to drop but didn't and these were the last pair in my size.

They're quite lovely and amazingly comfortable. I can't wait to wear them to the meetup. ^_^ 

Well, wish me luck for the rest of finals week! Cheers!~

Friday, December 9, 2011

Last Day of Classes

Welp, the end of the semester is nearly here. Today was the last day of regular classes for me and next week I only have a few finals. Whew! I'm so relieved that after next week I just get to relax. 

Today I gave my final speech in CMST. It was a persuasive speech urging my classmates to donate plasma and I think I did pretty well on it. I wasn't as nervous as I usually am during presentations, so I didn't stumble as much. I might have been just under the time limit though, I'm not sure.

The miracle is that I was even up in time for my speech today. You see, last night the hyenas on my floor were being particularly loud and obnoxious. I guess none of them need to study for their classes or finals. Fine, I hope they all flunk out and vacate the premises then. But to top it all off, one of the girls next door brought her boyfriend into our bathroom.

Let me explain something here. My floor is an all girls floor. I chose that way for a reason. I don't want guys up here all the time. I don't want guys in our all girls bathroom either. And there's a rule on non co-ed floors about having the opposite sex in the bathrooms. The rule is: Don't do it! 

It was about 11 pm when all this went down. I seriously don't feel comfortable peeing in the presence of some strange guy, so after I got out of the bathroom, I went down the hall and over to the other wing where my CA lives. She invited me in and I told her about the noise level in my wing and about the bathroom incident. She was understandably upset, much like I was. So I guess she's going to address these issues at our floor meeting tonight. If nothing changes after winter break, I'm gonna have to start some shit. Seriously.

Because that's not cool. 

In other news, after this floor meeting I get to go home! Apparently my most recent Bodyline order arrived today and I'm so excited to open it up and have a look. I bought this particular dress because it has a very "Beetlejuice" feel to it, which is one of my favorite films. 

There are so many awesome ways I could coordinate this dress and I'm ecstatic about giving it a go. 

This weekend I'm also gonna fix up my hair. I'm a little disappointed with Manic Panic's Pillarbox Red, but I'm gonna give it another try this weekend. Hopefully it'll stick well to what I currently have. You see.....the red looked awesome after I rinsed everything out. Now it looks orange. Want proof?

People are thinking I'm a Miami sports fan or something. The only people who say it looks really cool are the ones who knew it was holiday colors. I'm more than impressed with how the green's holding up but after washing my hair this week the red faded out to a sickly orange and I noticed that I missed a few spots on the green. So I'll fix it up and be done. ^_^

Well kids, I'm gonna get back to studying now. Here's my current work station and, in fact, where I'm writing this blog too! 

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

A very homey Christmas...

You know, someday I look forward to having my own place that I can go ahead and decorate for the holidays. Until then, I simply have to settle for indulging in the nostalgia that all my mom's decor evokes.

My mom's got an incredible collection of snowman themed decorations, which is great because then she can leave them up all winter long. So we decided to make our tree this year more winter themed than Christmas. So we've got blue and silver bulbs and snowflake/icicles on it. Very cute stuff. Enjoy!

Monday, December 5, 2011

A Strangely Wonderful and Terrible Weekend

Today was my last math unit exam. I'm pretty sure I bombed it, much like I bombed the last three units of homework I did last night as well. But I can't really be blamed, I hadn't slept the night before and I was very stressed out and exhausted. 

My weekend was quite fascinating, actually. Saturday was terrific. Chris and I went down to Maple Grove to try out a burger joint he's quite fond of. The place is called Five Guys and they really do have wonderful burgers. Even better though - were the french fries. Thick cut and fried in peanut oil, I felt as though I'd died and gone to some fast food heaven. 

Then we walked a block down to JoAnn Fabrics and I found the most delightful little Christmas print fabric: 

It's from Skelanimals, a brand that I found incredibly awesome while it briefly graced the shelves of the local Hot Topic, but it didn't hang around long. So I was very awed to find this and I got three yards of it. I also picked up a typical plaid with a bit shimmer and some dark green cotton. I'm gonna do quite a bit of sewing in the next few weeks! *squeals with glee*

Sunday, however, wasn't so great. At 2 am, I went with my mom to the ER because she was having chest pains. They concluded she might have a blood clot somewhere and did all these tests, but found nothing. I left at about 8:30 am to start doing my hair stuff and she didn't get released until about noon. Needless to say, none of us got any sleep and it was a pretty miserable day. On top of that, I didn't get my math homework finished up until nearly midnight - which is when it was due online! 

Although, I have to say, I operate surprisingly well on no sleep because I managed to make my hair look totally awesome. Granted, I had to bleach it TWICE the night before because that damn Splat! hair color was staying put, but after I got my preferred dyes in things went smoothly. I left it in for 5-6 hours and washed it out shortly before heading back to school last night.




And for the record, I was wearing lime green footie pajamas with cupcakes on them pretty much all of Sunday. It was great! 

Anyways, as soon as I got back to school I zipped through the last of my Math stuff and then crashed. I slept until 7:45 am and had some strange dreams. Now I just I hope things sort themselves out this week. 

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Preparing for Finals

It's the advent of finals week! Run for your lives!

But seriously, you can tell finals week is approaching just by looking at the dark circles under my eyes. If I wasn't sleeping very well before, I'm not sleeping at all these days. I think it's partly due the stress and then probably also due to the cackling hyenas on my floor who shriek like banshees until the wee hours of the morning. Sometimes I wonder where my CA is and why she isn't around to tell them to fuck off and be quiet...but I noticed that she often works the night shift at the front desk so yeah....

I have a LOT to do for the next two weeks and that's why I haven't been updating as much. I've been neglecting my Lolita blog even more than this one and I feel just awful about it, but I don't have the energy to write anything. And I haven't really been keeping up on the lasted Lolita whatsits or dressing up, so I feel like it'd be pointless to post right now. My daily style blog? Ha, shouldn't even exist. I'm lucky if I have enough energy in the morning to throw on jeans and a funky sweater before heading off to class. v_v

I'm so burnt out it's not even funny. 

My only real reprieve from college stress is my plasma pimping on Tuesdays and Thursdays. No seriously, I  get to spend a little over an hour and a half there with a good book and some quiet time. It's lovely. ^_^ If only they'd let me nap or meditate during, then I could just eliminate sleeping at night and work on homework! 

All of my math homework is due this Sunday. I have a book report to write, a final speech to prepare for, an audience analysis paper to pull out of my ass, a resume presentation to whip up, a few more random assignments tossed in and THEN I get to take my final exams. I knew college was going to be difficult, as far as time management was concerned, but if I knew they were going to pile it all on at the end of the semester I would have gotten myself on some anti-anxiety meds or something. 

To add a little cheer to my dreary university life, I decided to snitch a few of my mom's unused xmas decor and spruce up my dorm a bit.

A nice smelling air freshener (Festive Snow), my zombie strawberry plant, and a reindeer made of spruce?

Mr and Mrs Claus, plushy edition!

A cute little light set, shaped like a christmas tree.

It's not much, but it helps a little bit. Turns out that christmas tree light thing is WAY TOO BRIGHT when I'm trying to sleep so sadly I have to un-plug it at night.

Fun little tidbit:

This was my hair last week.

This is my hair this week.

I do not recommend Splat! hair dye unless you want something very, very temporary. And half of it will come out with the initial washing. 

This weekend, I'm going to bleach the rest out, and then go ahead with my half green and half red holiday theme idea. So I have to make a Hot Topic (don't sue me!) run this Friday and see what I can find. Hopefully they'll be carrying the colors I want and not too expensively either. Wish me luck!

66 posts....I really need to get on here more. :(

I don't have a whole lot of time between classes right now, but I thought I'd pop on and share this little gem with you. Onto the Goth quizzes! Rawr!

A New Agey Goth!
Bet you practice Wicca or Paganism or possibly more liberal Christianity. You probably love Dead Can Dance, anything ethereal, and might be vegetarian. You probably also like to hug people.

Uh, yup. Sure. 

Well, they got the Pagan aspect correct. I'm not a huge fan of Dead Can Dance, ethereal as in what?, and I'm most definitely NOT a vegan. I love me some red meat! ^_^ 

And I'm the least touchy-feely person you'll ever come across. I shoot death glares when people even attempt to shake my hand, half the time. So 

Anyways.....I'm sure I'll be back later or something.  

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Good Afternoon Children

I must apologize for the lack of posts recently - I've been buried under mountains of stress and struggling with time management. College life does that do a person. Final exams are coming up soon, but once I'm on Winter Break I'll have lots of time to regale you all with the details of my insignificant life.

But here are some brief updates of the goings-on in my world:

1) I finally did the plasma donation thing, last Tuesday. It was much less scary than I thought and so I have an appt. scheduled for today and then another one for Thursday. It'll give me time away from school and allow me an hour or so to work on reading things for leisure instead of knowledge. 

2) My Thanksgiving was great, how was yours? There was no big celebration or family get-together but Mom made turkey and all the fixings anyways. My boyfriend came over and then we spent the weekend boozing up and playing card games. I have them addicted to Apples to Apples now. If you're not familiar with the game, please become that way soon because it's awesome. <3

3) I started writing a fanfiction, based on Hellboy II. That'll be sweet.

4) I was asked to review The New Death and Others, which I will as soon as I get a moment to really sit down and enjoy reading it. Its seems a lot of people have been mentioning this book lately and for good reason - it's good. At least what little of it I've skimmed through is. 

5) My purple hair has faded out to a lovely blonde-pink color and even my auburn roots are showing through. Since December is creeping up soon, I've decided now would be a great time to bleach the remaining color out and replace it with half red and half green for the holiday season. Probably the most extensive at-home dying I'll ever attempt but I'm looking forward to it. Now I just need hair dye! 0_o

That's all folks, please enjoy your week! 

Oh, one more thing. I put up a new poll, so if you'd be so kind as to answer the question......thanks! 

Thursday, November 10, 2011

*Prick*...and here comes the blood.

At about 1:05 pm I scampered off over to the Miller Center (library) bus stop to take the metro bus here in St. Cloud for the first time. I rode to the transit center and caught Pantown over to Biolife - the plasma donation center. I had to walk a few blocks from the stop and boy, did I walk fast. It's so cold outside today. >_<

Anyways, when I got there, they got me all set up with their computer systems and made me a file. I was weighed and given a blood pressure test. My heart rate was a little high, but that's because I'd just booked it from a few blocks away. The nurse was going to check it again after she tested my blood, but in the end she didn't have to.

My iron levels were good enough, but my protein levels were too high. Seriously? I hardly even eat meat and my protein levels were high. I'm blaming my multivitamin. I won't take it before an appointment from now on. Urgh. So basically I got entered in the system and had my finger pricked. My only souvenir from my little jaunt across town?

This little bruise on my finger. And it hurts like a bitch too, I can barely hit the keys without wincing. >_< Maybe that's a good indication I should stop writing hmm?

But before I go, here's a photo of how faded out my hair is now:

If I look dead, it's because I'm tired, cold, and really hungry. ^_^

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Holiday Shopping for Goths

I don't know about you, but I tend to jump on the holiday shopping bandwagon pretty early in the year. It's not even Thanksgiving here in America and I'm already starting to think of ideas for what to give/make/buy for the holidays. 

Being a broke college student though, I can't really go all out and buy the people I love the latest new gadgets and tons of "in" stuff. So I'm trying to think of things that I can make for relatively cheap that will be of use AND still cherished as a delightful holiday gift. 

Problem is...most of the things I want to make tend to have a bit of Goth flair to it - black lace, skulls and skeleton keys, candy canes dripping with blood, stuff like that....and I know that not all of the people on my shopping list would appreciate something like that. 

Then there's the matter of people possibly trying to shop for me. I have my doubts about receiving anything for the holidays though, since my family is so disjointed these days an no one talks anymore. The people I AM still close with are having a ton of financial problems of their own. 

And this won't be the first holiday season that I spend without receiving any gifts, even though I make or buy some for others. And I don't mind that, really. Because the season isn't about being selfish and wanting a ton of new stuff and people seem to forget that. I like the atmosphere of the winter holidays, the sparkle and magic attached to it, and that it has a feeling of good cheer and inclusiveness. People either seem a lot happier and more polite or completely frazzled and rude. 

But enough of my incessant rambling....what do you like to get for your loved ones during the holiday season? And what do you prefer to get if people insist on shopping for you?

Sunday, November 6, 2011

Clearance Halloween Target Haul

I hit up Target on Friday afternoon to see what was left of the Halloween decor. I ended up getting quite a few items. All of what is posted above and then a spooky candy and a ghost coffee mug. Most of it was 50% off so I got some great deals! And the best part is, all of this stuff is useful outside of Halloween too.

I put the bat lights up around my window. Super awesome. <3

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Knowing Better and of Dashed Hopes

I really ought to know better. I know I shouldn't believe a word out of anyone's mouth. Ever. Because people lie. And they lie for many different reasons. They lie because they feel obligated to "help out" and then panic when someone accepts. They lie because they think they might be able to do something for you, but really can't. Or maybe they lie just because they like to watch you squirm when you find out what was promised ain't happening.

I don't fucking like squirming.

As it turns out, this Britney individual WON'T be giving me a ride home tomorrow. So now it's a mad dash to see if my boyfriend can give me a lift tonight (how last minute of me) or hopefully harass someone into doing it Friday, if it doesn't conflict with their schedule.

Because the more I think about it, the more depressed I am at the idea of sitting here by myself for a whole weekend. I NEED to relax. I NEED to recuperate. I have exams most of next week and I just can't orient myself unless I can escape for a little while. Seriously. 

Because I hate this place. I'm SO READY for Winter Break. 

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Out of the Stone Age

It seems I'm slowly but surely starting to crawl out of my cozy little bat-ridden cave: I got a cellphone. I activated it today.

I've had a cellphone before, quite a few years ago. This was back when I was working full-time and could afford to vomit up enough money so T-Mobile would stop harassing me. This was back before the era of qwerty keyboards and Facebook apps. This was when text messaging was in its neanderthal stage.

After my little jaunt in Montreal and suffering quite a few years without gainful employment, I've been reluctant to jump back on the cellphone bandwagon. Truth be told, I liked not having one. Most people seem to thrive on the idea that they can be connected to people EVERYWHERE, all the time. I'm, admittedly, adverse to that idea. I like my privacy. I enjoy my alone-time.

But lately I've come to realize that so much alone time just isn't that fulfilling and I crave more social contact. So I caved in and let Chris buy me a nice little cellphone from Straight Talk that has a slide out keyboard. I used to sneer at such things, honestly. But it's growing on me. I kind of like it and I'm hopefully going to get some use out of it.

Moving on....

My purple hair has faded out to a lovely dark pink shade already. I washed it last night and even though I used my conditioner with a dollop of hair dye in it, it's still pretty washed out. Oh well.

Chris is going to a funeral in Chicago this weekend, so he won't be able to pick me up. I was lamenting the idea of being trapped in St. Cloud ALL WEEKEND long, when an old friend jumped up to save the day. She offered to bring me back to Buffalo on Thursday...meaning I'll have to miss two of my classes for the week, but that's certainly doable. I haven't missed much yet and I'm not behind in anything currently.

I'll probably hit up Target that afternoon as well to see if I can scour through any of the Halloween decor remnants and maybe pick up some lovely decorations for either my room at home or the dorm. Now that I've taken down my cheesy hand-me-down decorations the room feels quite empty and I'd like to permanently Goth it up a bit. ^_^

That's about all for now. Have a great week everyone.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Happy Halloween!

1.) The mirror outside my dorm hall bathroom is evidently excellent for outfit snaps. I will endeavor to use it for this person from now on!

2.) I sincerely thought I'd be one of few people on campus in costume. I was delightfully mistaken.

3.) My goofy hair color is growing on me. I'm sure it'll fade out by the end of the week, but that's okay too!

4.) Happy Halloween!

Oh yeah!

Is anyone else participating in the Ouija Experiment tonight? I so totally am!